It is said that a good guy is hard to find. The only "good ones" I've seen have been found, and molded, by their current girlfriends from a ripe, young age. The others..suck. Everyone tells me that they are out there. Ironically, this is right after they have sobbed their eyes out about the last asshole that screwed them over.
Are we being naive for believing someone good is really out there? Or is it better to enjoy your life without this disillusion that there is something more? This is what I am purposing to find out.
So for a year, I have determined to go on as many dates as possible to find out if there really are good guys left. If not, I am swearing them off and buying a cat.
In order to do this, I need your help. If you claim to know any of these good guys, hook a sister up. Otherwise, my skepticism will turn me into a bitter old cat women who dreams of opening a castration service.
Delusional Devin (#2)
Delusional Devin and I went on a date that left me wanting to bang my head against the wall. It started off with me picking him up because his car was broken. Fiddling with my radio, I listened to deafening static until he found a station that he enjoyed. This was the beginning to a fantastic fun filled night.
Dinner consisted of me thinking semi-suicidal thoughts while I tried to pry for something to redeem this guy. Darling Devin did not play sports because they were too rugged. He didn’t read because nothing had the magical ability to captivate him. He is not in school because he is busy building his future. But he wasn’t building his future yet because he was waiting for things to fall together and feel right.
The things he said and the things he did completely contradicted each other. He claimed to be sensitive to women because he was raised by his mother. Then he continued onto stories of him losing feelings for girls and just dropping them because “it obviously wasn’t working out”.
Mid-dinner, Devin’s ex-girlfriend called. He answered his phone and all I heard was yelling and screaming from her end. Devin tried to play it off by walking away. I guess he forgot I have these crazy things called ears and with that the ability to hear him say, “I’m not on a date, I’m out with a friend, I’ll call you after my friend drops me off”.
Devin is some kind of stupid version of the devil.
Dear darling Devin had the perseverance and determination of a marble tile, the ego of a true narcissist, and a grasp of reality similar to a schizophrenic.
When the bill came, he decided we should split it in half, even though he had two rounds of Blue Long Islands. Technically this left me paying more than half the bill on our first date. He doesn’t like to put monetary or any sort of effort into a girl until he knows she is “The One”.
I guess his mom forgot to tell him that things in life require some kind of real sense of reality. Oh, and that the world revolves around the sun, not his balding head.
